You know who I was say...6-7 years ago? I was confused, anxious, withdrawn, emotionally needy, depressed, negative, & lost. It was hidden from many but obvious to some. I was overmedicated to compensate for the anxiety & depression I struggled with. I was fed the lie by the enemy that I couldn't be anything more. I thought that was the best the I could ever offer this world because I wasn't strong enough to overcome it. I thought I was no good to God because I was so broken..because of who I was and how I took on life. I felt like I had no value or worth. The lies from the enemy are strong and I had no clue they were there. I would say that was rock bottom for me...where is there to look when your at rock bottom? Up!
The tremendous turn around of where I was then & where God has brought me now is amazing. Those who have only met me in the past few years probably have no idea that I was that way. The transformation that God has placed in me is beautiful. Sure, I've failed - I've fallen time and time again - but He's always picked me back up and I confidently believe He is working in me today, tomorrow, and until the day He welcomes me home. In HIM, I have overcome. In HIM, I will overcome. I am a conqueror in Christ. He has conquered through me. Wretched me. If I desire to be more for Him, he will shape me - change me - mold me into the extraordinary.
It's easy to think we're not good enough. We can't do enough. We aren't special or talented or creative or loveable. The world tells us that. Our unnecessary comparison to others tells us that. God didn't make us to be like anyone else.
I still feel awkward in social situations at times, I still doubt my self worth at times, I still can't public speak, I still I have some issues about my true beauty, I find myself wondering how my menial housecleaning/diaper changing/laundry washing/grocery shopping can really have significance. I have lots He is welcome to change in me but it's a process not an overnight deal. It involves defeating those enemy lies that I am not good enough but I'm ready for it.